My heart has been a little sad. Many tragedies have happened this past few weeks. So many families are broken and in despair, and my heart aches for them and I pray that God would comfort them in a way only He can. But something else has made me really sad; something that should not have.
A dear friend shared a testimony and though I was truly happy and shared in her excitement, I could not help but feel a tinge of sadness.
Sadness because I too have been waiting and praying for my own testimony and it seemed like mine was taking forever to appear. I was disappointed because I felt like somehow God had forgotten me. Just like the week before, when that other family shared their testimony and instead of rejoicing with them, my heart ached yet again. When would my own come, I asked? When would it be my turn? When would God remember me?
It can be so difficult to wait joyfully when tough seasons tarry when our answers seem delayed. Everyone around us is getting married but for some of us, there is no brother in sight. Everyone is having children, but you are still waiting. When you go from one job interview to the other with no offer in sight, and when you keep getting bypassed for the promotion at work. It is hard to wait. It’s even harder to wait joyfully. I started to write this post last week and my heart was so overwhelmed that I just couldn’t finish it. I was so discouraged, yes, my faith was waning. My heart was getting bitter and I was angry that God was silent. Where was all this bitterness coming from? What was sapping my joy?
Hmmm … The enemy had me, just where he wanted me; in a place of ingratitude and comparison. I was focusing on all the things going wrong and I had failed to recognize the faithfulness of God in the midst of my trials. For a second, I had forgotten who my heavenly was and what He could do. I had doubted the goodness and faithfulness of God. What happened to waiting until my change came? What happened to praising my way through? What happened to counting it all joy? What had happened to my confession? I had allowed my situation to speak to me and I sat silently, listening, crying and lamenting. And before I knew it, bitterness had crept into my heart. What happened to encouraging myself in the Lord and standing on His promises? I, like Naomi, was choosing to be bitter because of the blows that life was dealing with me. I was allowing the enemy lie to me. Last night, I did something that I should have done all along. I spoke to myself and my situation, I said:
“Stella, why are you discouraged? Why are you disquieted within you? Hope in the Lord, for you shall yet praise Him.”
I spoke over myself and I encouraged myself in the Lord. I reminded myself of how much God loved me and how He had great plans for me. I listened to some messages and faith began to well up in my heart again, and then I put some praise on. I said:
“Devil, you are not going to rob me of my joy any longer. God is for me, and He is not against me. This too shall pass.”
You see, God has never failed me. It’s not in His nature to fail. So, I had to remind myself that the chapter is not over for my story has not ended yet. The master writer is writing my script and it would be a blockbuster in the end. I had to remind myself that God can be trusted, that the fact He was silent didn’t mean that He had forgotten or forsaken me. I had to say it loud so I could hear it, that God was a good God and that everything He allowed me to go through was all part of His eternal plan and that good was going to come out of this season
You see, stop sitting around waiting for someone to encourage you. They just might be going through their own stuff and don’t even have the right words to say to you. So, get up, open your mouth and speak over your life. No need to be bitter because it’s happening for A and it’s not happened for you yet. Shake that bitterness off you and rejoice with them. Your blessings are coming. God would surely give you a testimony. I encourage you as I encourage myself today to make it a daily practice of speaking over your life. Speak God’s truth about your situation and let faith flood your heart as you wait for the manifestation of God’s promises. As we wait, let’s make sure our attitude glorifies God every day. Be encouraged for we shall yet praise him.
Pray with me:
Dear lord, I refuse to be bitter or discouraged over the things I am believing in you for. Help me to wait joyfully for my harvest season and while I wait, help me to rejoice and celebrate with others because I know my own time is coming. Lord, help me to continue to grow my faith as I fill my heart with your word. Teach me to speak life over my life and situation and not death. Thank you, Lord, for I trust you and I know that you would never forsake the righteous Be my strength, my hope, my joy and my peace as I wade through this tough season
In Jesus’ Mighty Name.
Psalm 42: 5 (NLT)
Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again— my Savior and my God
Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him: but I will maintain mine own ways before him.
Yet he did not waver through disbelief in the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God
1 Sam 30: 3-6 (KJV)
So David and his men came to the city, and, behold, it was burned with fire; and their wives, and their sons, and their daughters, were taken captives. Then David and the people that were with him lifted up their voice and wept, until they had no more power to weep. And David’s two wives were taken captives, Ahinoam the Jezreelitess, and Abigail the wife of Nabal the Carmelite. And David was greatly distressed; for the people spake of stoning him, because the soul of all the people was grieved, every man for his sons and for his daughters: but David encouraged himself in the Lord his God.